Posts Tagged: identity

Lessons in the Storm

Recently I have been faced with one of the hardest things that I have had to go through in my adult life.  While I am still in the midst of it all, there are a few things I have learned in last couple weeks.

  • I have learned that no matter what my circumstances are God never changes, His love for me never changes and His character never changes.  Hebrews 13:8 “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”  And in life’s hardest moments, He remains faithful.  He is here as a quiet still and peaceful presence through the storm.

He is here with me in my sadness.

He is here with me in the joyous moments.

He is here with me in the moments that I don’t understand.

He is here with me when I pretend to be ok and ignore my feelings.

He is here with me when I don’t understand my feelings and can’t put a name to it.

 

  • I have learned that having community/relationships is so vital to get through life.  And it is in community that I have be vulnerable.   In being willing to share with others and I realize that I am are not alone.  Being vulnerable is risky but it is so worth it.  There is healing that can happen for myself and the other person(s) when I am vulnerable.

 

  • Allowing the community to love and care for me is important.  I am good at caring for others but I am not always good at letting others care for me. When I don’t allow others to do this for me, it robs them of the gift to care for me.  And as humans, we are created for relationship and community.  And a healthy community cares for each other.

 

  • I have learned to live in a tension of not knowing the truth but while still dealing with my emotions that may or may not be based out of reality.  It is not an easy tension to live in but is a necessary tension for me to live in.  But as I live in this tension I also rest in God.  I rest because I trust in Him as He can see whole puzzle and I only see my pieces and those pieces around me.

 

  • I have learned to admit that I am not ok when I am not ok.  And that life is hard sometimes.  And this is a hard for me to learn.  I have kept a protective wall around me that not many people pass through in general, especially when I am not doing ok emotionally.  I have learned in life to have this wall there because of past hurts and it is easier to not let people in when there is a chance to be hurt again.  But when I keep people at an arm’s length, I am only putting myself on an island.  In this island, I am on my own trying to survive and it is much harder than it needs to be sometimes.  And if I take myself off the island and take down the wall, I will not be alone and I will have others who will be there to walk beside me in life.

There is a song that I have been identifying with the last couple weeks.

Maybe it’s ok if I’m not ok
‘Cause the One who holds the world is holding onto me
Maybe it’s all right if I’m not all right
‘Cause the One who holds the stars is holding my whole life

“Maybe It’s Ok”by We are Messengers.

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl5GcRrJLyw&w=560&h=315]

  • I have learned that grief and sadness goes in ebbs and flows. While I am ok most of the time, there are moments where it will comes what seems like out of nowhere.  And I have learned to allow myself experience the emotion that comes with it but not allow myself to stay there longer than I need to be.

 

  • I have learned to praise God in the midst of the storm.  It is in the storm that the praise is even more sweeter than when the storm ceases.  When I praise God in the midst of the storm, I am putting my eyes on Him rather than the storm.  He is more powerful than the storm that is in my life.  He provides peace in the midst of the storm.

 

While I don’t know when this will end, I do know that God with me in the midst of the storm.  He is teaching me new things in this storm.  I trust Him in the midst of the storm.

If you are going through a hard season in life, look at what you can learn through it all.  Look to the peace in the storm rather than focusing on the storm.

The Waiting Place

God has been teaching me patience and to wait on his timing for probably the most of my life.  There are times in life that I have felt like I was in the waiting place(according to Dr. Seuss) for a long time and in many ways I am still in the waiting place.  Excerpt from Oh The Places You’ll Go by Dr. Seuss:

“You can get so confused

that you’ll start in to race

down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace

and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,

headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.

The Waiting Place…

…for people just waiting.

Waiting for a train to go

or a bus to come, or a plane to go

or the mail to come, or the rain to go

or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow

or waiting around for a Yes or a No

or waiting for their hair to grow.

Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite

or waiting for wind to fly a kite

or waiting around for Friday night

or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake

or a pot to boil, or a Better Break

or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants

or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.

Everyone is just waiting.”

It is in this waiting place that we often get impatient and frustrated with God and life. And we can ruin what God make have in store for us.  Granted God can use us in all situations to even if its not in His plan but for His glory.  But where we may end up might not be as good as God intended us to be.  We humans have a way of getting in the way of God because we think that we know best for us.  But in reality the creature(us) does not see the whole picture like the Creator(God) does.  So how can we know what is best for us over the Creator that created us into existance.

Sometimes we need to stay in this waiting place for God to prepare us for something greater than we can imagine.  The waiting place is not an easy place to be but it is in that waiting place we can experience the peace and love of our Creator.  Even though we may have no idea what is going to happen next.  In uncertain times, there can be peace and joy because we have our Creator walking beside us in life.

Do I have life all figured out?  No, I will never on this earth but I do know that I am a child of God who has a God that loves me more than I can imagine and fathom.  (It still amazes me that God would love me and that He wants a personal relationship with me with millions of people on this earth.)  And I would rather be in the waiting place with my Creator than in a place on my own.  When we are in this waiting place, we need to sit back allow God to do the work and be ready to follow His calling for our lives out of the waiting place.

Identity

Who are you? What is your identity in?  Most of us answer by describing our roles in life.  We have many roles we play in life.  For myself some of the roles are aunt, friend, daughter, photographer, sister, etc.  While the roles in my life are part of who I am and they are important to me, it is not where my identity lies.  If I find my identity in these roles I will not be satisfied.  Because I am finding my satisfaction in something that will always leave a void that only God can fill.  “The Bible says that our real problem is that every one of us is building our identity on something besides Jesus.” Timothy Keller

We sometimes answer this question not only with the roles that are in our lives.  But sometimes with our past or what has been spoken over us or labels given to us by others in our lives.  One example of this would be victim.  We sometimes are victims because of what has happened to us in our lives.  If we are not careful, it can become our identity.  When we think about who we are, we think about what has happened and this becomes who we are.  Many times when we are a victim, something is lost and we need to grieve that loss and the hurt.  And sometimes we can use their life circumstances to help others through similar situations.  But it should not be where our identity lies.

In my own life when I think about the question of who am I, too often the roles in my life come to mind.  Rather than where my true identity lies and that is in God and Jesus.

I am a daughter of the King.  He is my Father and Creator.  “Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—” John 1:12  

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is.” 1 John 3:1-2  

“For in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.” Galatians 3:26

I am His princess and I was accepted into a royal family when I chose Jesus as Lord over my life.  “But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9

I am a sinner saved by grace.  Jesus paid the penalty for my sin.  “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 6:23

I live in freedom and I am forgiven as a child of God.  “For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin—” Romans 6:6  

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1  

“For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life.” Romans 5:10  

I am loved by a Father unconditionally no matter what I have been through and no matter what I do in my life.  His love for me is not contingent on my actions.  “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love.” John 15:9

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39

So I ask you again who or what is your identity in?  Is it in in our past or the roles that we fulfill in life or is it in our Creator who is the only one that can fill those voids we have?